I wonder why this went straight to video

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus trailer from Asylum Home Entertainment

The California coast is terrorized by two enormous prehistoric sea creatures as they battle each other for supremacy of the sea and only Deborah “Foolish Beat” Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas of Black Dawn fame (not to be confused with Red Dawn) can save us from certain doom. Who will win this battle royal – only time will tell. But my money is on the Mega Shark that jumps (breeches) a few thousand feet into the air to take down a passenger airliner (traveling at a mere 565 mph). But I may be biased. Hopefully, the humans will be the first to go.

And now for a little history from everyone’s most trusted site…


…on second thought, no. I’ll just share what I’ve surmised from various sources. The megalodon (“big tooth” in Greek) lived from 18 million to 1.5 million years ago (if you find carbon dating reliable). They grew to about 60 ft long (in dispute) and are either Carcharodon megalodon or Carcharocles megalodon (also in dispute). A 16 year old teen found a tooth in Michigan but its in dispute whether the donor shark left it there or it was carried there by ancient humans.

Gigantic octopus (not to be confused with Giant octopus) is a mythical species of octopus that’s been used to explain seamonsters such as the lusca and the kraken and unidentifiable globsters (look it up yourself). Like sharks, octopuses don’t have skeletons to leave fossils for us to find. So they can’t ever have existed, right. Since they never existed, we can’t guess how large they were but I’ll hypothesize that since the Megalodon is three times larger than a white shark, the Gigantic Octopus is three times larger than the Giant Octopus, or 60 ft long (what are the odds!)

Anyways, since facts are relative, lets just say I won’t be watching this movie unless I lose a bet or win a dare.

One thought on “I wonder why this went straight to video

  1. /Watches Clip/


    Sometimes you just have to watch for the sheer awfulness of it. Preferably when low on sleep and high on caffeine.

    Or you can be like me and look up William Hung Remixes or gems like this … on purpose.

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